Building resilience comes to us by encountering a series of stumbling blocks, obstacles, and about-faces. We build strength by collecting these experiences, recovering, and rising to fight another day.
Lately, I've been thinking a lot about resilience and wondering, "Are we resilient yet?" For insight, I've turned to Brene Brown's book Rising Strong, how the ability to reset transforms the way we live, love, parent, and lead”.
She outlines three steps to build resilience: The Reckoning, The Rumble, and The Revolution.
[One of] my stories of resilience
The 20th anniversary of 9/11 was a not so gentle reminder of one of my most dramatic "rising" experiences. In 2001, I lived and worked as a consultant in New York City on the Upper West Side. True to form as a consultant, I had flown to Los Angeles the evening of Monday, September 10th, for an assignment. The series of events that unfolded from that day changed my life forever - but the insights came years later.
The reckoning
Like many in the dot.com bubble days, my employer, Viant, closed its doors about three months after September 11th. I was out of work and living in one of the most expensive cities in the world. I had come to New York as a challenge to myself - "if I can make it there, I'll make it anywhere." Determined not to let this setback beat me, I searched for another position, visiting job fairs with hundreds of out-of-work New Yorkers. Unemployed-Amy lasted about six months. Then - the reckoning.
I had to choose to double down on New York or go "back" to Atlanta, where I had deep roots and an extensive network. I reached out to former colleagues for job opportunities and found one with my former employer, Turner.
The rumble: Owning the story
I returned to Atlanta for a role in the finance department of Turner - a more senior position than the one I had left five years prior. I was excited, but it did feel like deja vu. Back at my old company and working for a former boss.
The story I'm telling myself.
The story I was telling myself is that I had slid backward in my life and career.
The reframe
I was five years wiser, more educated, and more experienced. This event was nothing but a plot twist! What seemed like a back-slide was, in fact, a gift. To be in a familiar place, with new skills and newfound strength.
The revolution
Turner was going through changes, so I took the opportunity to design a new role for myself. I developed a job description, pitched the part, positioned myself, built and cultivated a team over the next ten years.
At the same time, the butterfly effect of the change was taking hold in other areas of my life. I met my spouse, had my son, grew and advanced in my career.
These past few years have been tough!
In truth, the lessons of resilience will become clear farther down the road.
Think about your rumble, reckoning, and reframe and know that you build resilience muscles with every step.
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